Reciprocity 101: A Guide to Equal Investment in Relationships

Are you investing your time, energy, and emotions in the right people? Imagine the thrill of investing in a high-performing stock - now apply that same strategy to your relationships. That's right, we're taking a hard look at how we choose to invest in people, not just things. We're talking about prioritizing ourselves, realizing our own worth, and making sure we're not left feeling short-changed in our relationships. We'll give you the tools to navigate the complex world of personal investments, so you can make informed decisions based on thorough analysis and not just fleeting feelings.

Ever wondered why some relationships just feel imbalanced? It's all about reciprocity, and we're going to explore this in-depth. We will discuss the importance of matching energy levels and how to communicate effectively when you feel your investments aren't being reciprocated. Remember: Never invest in someone based on how much you like them. Invest in someone based on how much they invest in you. So, grab your favorite beverage and join us for a thought-provoking conversation that could change the way you view your relationships.

Credit: Energy Budget by Toni Jones. Be sure to check it out!!

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:08

découvrir. Welcome back to another episode of the Sister Find Yourself podcast. I am your host, corky Nelson, and I am jumping right into the topic of today's episode. How many of you have ever invested in something?

Speaker 1: 0:47

I started investing in stocks years ago when I decided it was more important for me to own a piece of a company with a proven history of profits than to own products from that company. I used to buy products from companies that I invest in, but I understood the value or the importance of. Instead of standing in line for the newest New Jordans, I bought a few shares of Nike's stock because their success was now my success. I invested my money after watching the behaviors of this stock because I knew I'd receive a return on my investment. The same for cars, my home items in my home, clothing, beauty products, etc. Anything you purchase is an investment and, thanks to the internet, any risk taken with purchases can be minimized. Why? Because we have reviews, we read those reviews, we check better business bureau ratings, we study a thing first and if we don't like what we discover, no matter how much we love the product, we pass as we should. Why? Because investing, buying, having whatever that item is, won't give us the return on our investment we want. The gorgeous car may have an awful miles per gallon average or something. There may be some issues with a part. The home builders of the property that we want might have a less than stellar, better business bureau rating. That five star hotel or restaurant may have two star reviews. So we already know what that experience will likely look like. One example TeeMoo and I may be pronouncing it wrong, t-e-m-u. That's the latest craze for me. I noticed an ad on Facebook and Facebook made me do it. One of the things about TeeMoo is number one their prices are super cheap. Number two, so are their clothes. But the beauty of this app is you are able to look at reviews from real people. What reviews that can be purchased that give their items a five star, four star rating.

Speaker 1: 3:20

These are truly reviews from people who have made purchases. They upload photos, they talk about whether it's a good size. They talk about the quality of the material. They talk about a lot of different things. So you go in with the knowledge of what you're going to purchase.

Speaker 1: 3:41

Now don't get me wrong. I do understand the importance of purchasing quality items. You get what you pay for. However, in today's society where fashion fads are all over the place and you just. There's such a variety of things that you can buy and wear from time to time. If you want to buy something that's not quite as high quality as what you normally would understand that it may be a one and done, but it also may be dependent on how you take care of the product. Something that is a little bit more expensive you may be able to get away with machine washing it on delicate as opposed to a cheaper item. You know it's got to go to the cleaners and you're going to pray when it goes that it comes back the same size, not two sizes smaller, than when you sent it or took it.

Speaker 1: 4:39

Now, this is not a episode about purchasing things and investing in stocks. I said all of that to make a point. We are a society of consumers. We study patterns, behaviors and we invest our money in things we can potentially gain something from having right. So why don't we do that with people we're working on building relationships with? I saw a quote list in 24 hours ago that reads invest in people who invest in you.

Speaker 1: 5:22

A relationship is an investment of time, energy, ourselves. When one party us or them is interested, is really ready to invest, they show up, and they don't just show up every now and then they show up consistently. Time is created for you, and I listen to words, I study words, and if you zip, tie those lips long enough, you can hear everything that you need to hear. And I love to hear someone say I'm going to make time for you, as opposed to I'm going to find the time. Now, we all know that time cannot be found, time cannot be made. Time is time and it keeps on ticking. But when someone just changing that one word I'm going to make time as opposed to I'm going to find some time or the time Maybe, maybe that's just me, I don't know, but prioritizing you in their life is seen and felt. Their actions line up with their words and with good communication. Any inconsistencies that are occurring that leave you in a state of chaos and confusion instead of peace and clarity are quickly remedied. It's not hard, or it doesn't have to be hard, when two people want the same thing, when you're both investing in each other, not leaving one to feel slighted in any way, it can be a beautiful thing.

Speaker 1: 7:09

Someone offered this advice, which is very similar to the quote that I saw last night, and it was never invest in someone based on how much you like them. Invest in someone based on how much they invest in you. I think that deserves a repeat. Never invest in someone based on how much you like them. Invest in someone based on how much they invest in you. Our instinct is to do the complete opposite we invest proportionate to how much we like this person, not how much we're seeing a mutual investment. That's where self-discovery comes in, though. We have to study why we move the way we move and make the adjustments that we need to make to protect ourselves, our time, our energy, our everything, because, at the end of the day, we can't get either of those back. So you have to choose carefully who you decide to invest them in. Be with someone who matches your energy.

Speaker 1: 8:27

Several months ago, a friend of mine sent me a track on YouTube from a spoken word artist by the name of Tony Jones, and the name of the track is energy budget, and she talks. It's really deep. It's about six minutes long. I am going to link it in the episode description because I think that anyone could benefit from listening to this young lady. She talks about how emotionally generous people have to be very skilled in who receives that gift and you know whether you're an emotionally generous person or not. I don't have to go into a long diatribe about that, because that's understood. When you're an emotionally generous person, it can become very, very taxing if you're giving that gift to the wrong person. You know, when the math ain't mathin', we have to people people wiser.

Speaker 1: 9:29

Another thing she says is that we have to learn to release expired emotional ties. That's that every new year's Eve I know you guys have seen it on Facebook the lady that has the big bag over her shoulder and she's walking up these stairs and the stairs are indicative of everything that she's leaving behind in this old year. So we have to learn how to release expired emotional ties. Another thing that she mentions in the track is you've got to focus your energy on who sees you and respects you, and not just who is looking at you physically, who is seeing you mentally, spiritually, just the complete you.

Speaker 1: 10:17

She says her cutoffs aren't personal, they're spiritual, and I felt that the people you matter to the right person will appreciate and, more importantly, reciprocate. Reciprocity is what is all about. Investing in another person is definitely a choice, so never take a person's choice to invest in you for granted and never, absolutely ever, be afraid to communicate how the other person's lack of investment makes you feel, and that's it. That is the, as they say on social media. That's the post Nothing long and drawn out, but invest in people who invest in you. Thank you, guys for tuning in. Please like, subscribe and share this podcast and, as always, until next time, take care you.